Another MRI, Physical Therapy and an appointment with Neurology at Duke

Chimney Rock, North Carolina
Chimney Rock with all four of my kids.  Ninja Gurl is behind Hannah.  You can barely see her pink shoe!

Yeah yeah yeah I’ve been down for the count since June of 2014.  I was coming back from a LIVE TV appearance in Greenville, South Carolina and I had the babies with me along with my Mamaw and Great Aunt.  I kept getting what felt like a cramp in my right leg, below my knee.  It was very aggravating and I even took my shoe off while driving.  I remember it hurting the whole ride home.  My Mamaw volunteered to drive BUT she was 83 at the time and I chose to take my chances with a leg cramp and cruise control. 

The next morning, a Saturday, I couldn’t move and found myself going to my doctor.  Thankfully they have Saturday hours!  It was awful.  I can remember just sobbing in bed because my back hurt so badly.  No matter what I did - I suffered whether it was out loud or in silent.  I tend to suffer in silent more than out loud UNLESS I’ve had ENOUGH then I tend to get grumpy.  Yeah, sorry about that to those who have been on that end of my anger.  I promise that it’s not you, it’s me.  {gentle smile}

During all of this I’ve had numerous tests - x-rays, MRIs, CTs and even an emergency room visit that ended up being a kidney stone.  I’ve tried chiropractics, rolfing, yoga and physical therapy.  Currently I am going to physical therapy and I walk a mile through the hood a couple of times a week.

There's a lot of things that I am unable to do or NOT SUPPOSED to do.  Yeah yeah, there is a difference.

I’m not supposed to bend or twist or twist while bending.  The dishwasher is a HUGE NO NO and so is laundry.  Putting the clothes in the washer, putting the clothes in the dryer from the washer and then getting the clothes from the dryer.  You get the drift.  Bending over to pick up toys or to straighten the pillows on the couch will get me fussed at.  {innocent look}

Nodding my head.

I get fussed at all the time.

Shrug, you gotta do what you gotta do.

I’m not able to cross my legs at the knee because it’s not comfortable.  I find driving difficult at times since I have to use my “bad” leg, the right one.  I find that if I move my seat up {a lot} I can drive more comfy.  Even walking is difficult for me and I cannot do steps.  Steps are NO FUN at all for me.

I can no longer wear high heels just when I started wearing them all the time.  I love heels and rather miss them now.  I even bought a few flats!!!  Me in FLATS!  So totally not fair!  But no one said life was fair. 

It’s difficult for me to go out and sit in one spot for a long time, like ten minutes and I start to fidget.  I’m sorry if you think it’s because I’m bored and want to rush out because it is NOT, it’s only that I’ve begun to hurt and that makes me restless.

Yet, I do all of the above because it’s something that has to be done.

{Except wear the heels, NO WAY can I do that.  I’ve tried.  Hanging head.}

GOODNESS gracious!  When all of this started I even took all FOUR kids for a DAY of hiking all the trails at Chimney Rock.  I don’t know how I did it but I did and we had a fabulous time. 

Last week I got ANOTHER opinion from a neurosurgeon that I hear is a genius.  I was so hopeful that he would have the answers to why I am in physical pain every single day.  Some days are worse because I’m more active and some days are just worse when I take it easy.  I know that I will have to take my medication when I first get up in the morning so I can stop being the hunchback of North Asheville.  It allows me to fix breakfast and pack lunches for the girls and then I take them to school.  Believe it or not but I’ve slacked off on my OCDness clean house.  It’s odd.  My house is dusty at the moment and could use a thorough vacuum but I just don’t care.  I don’t have the energy and I know that it will cause me to hurt more.

Shrug.

I never thought I’d get to this point of not caring.  I guess being in pain since June will do that do a person.

I get pissed off that one may think that I may be neglecting my family duties.  Pft.  Just because I am not in a cast where you know I need rest, help and possibly in pain does NOT mean I am not feeling those things.  Just because you cannot see where I am “injured” DOES NOT mean that I am not exhausted, that I don’t need an extra helping hand and just because you don’t see an injury doesn’t mean I am NOT in excruciating pain because I am.

Whatever you do, don’t doubt my dedication to my family - spouse and kids.  They come first and then I may suffer in silence but by golly I will cook breakfast, makes lunches, cook dinner, do the laundry, wash their hair and play games and I won’t mention the things that I do for my husband.  Ha ha. 

So anyway I saw the genius doc last week and he ordered an ultrasound of my leg to check for a blood clot {there wasn’t one}, a couple x-rays of my back and an MRI of another part of my spine {happens today} and then he’s writing a referral for pain management and he suggested that I go to Duke Medical for a neurological exam to check for a nerve disorder.  I cannot quote him word for word because I was sobbing at this point.  I was glad that my daughter was there to remember everything.

That’s all I got.

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