Did you miss me?
I’ve not been feeling well this week. At one point I thought I was having a heart attack, PAIN in my chest, shortness of breath and I couldn’t stop burping. I just knew that something was wrong. I went to my doctor and he did an EKG which showed my heart was doing well at the moment in time anyway. Then he gave a Nexium (GO ANNA) to see if it was indigestion. Hours later I was still feeling bad with chest pain and shortness of breath so an ultrasound of my gallbladder was scheduled. The gallbladder looked fine but they did find kidney stones, which I already knew about. YAY, lucky me!
So, we really have no answers. Yesterday I took three kids out to lunch and then grocery shopping. It was stressful to me more than enjoyable at the store because of those DAMN little carts they’ve added for the kids! I HATE THEM, I HATE THEM, AND I HATE THEM. Not only do I have to worry about Baby M knocking me down my hitting my heels, I have to worry about her knocking all these glass bottles down and running into other people. STRESSFUL! I’ve voiced my anger when they first brought them out but others like them! I don’t know who in their rightful mind would love those damn things!!!
Just say NO to the carts!
When we got home I just felt awful and knew I was going to shut down into my happy place and take a nap. I did. Then I spent an hour in the kitchen fixing dinner just knowing I was going to BUST with anxiety. We even tried to watch a movie but the kids were (on purpose) making it difficult to match the movie because that meant that they weren’t getting the attention they wanted. Poor kids. Suck it up it’s life! So while Superdad was getting them in bed I feel asleep on the couch (after slipping a Xanax). I know I’ve been weaned off of it for weeks but perhaps the aching in my chest, shortness of breath, feeling that I want to die is all anxiety related. I do have four kids, one husband and now a dog to care for and perhaps I cannot control certain emotions and maybe I do need this medication.
I took a second dose this morning so I will see how it goes. Either I can continue to hurt which will end me up at the doctors tomorrow or the medication will help me relax and I will better. Here’s hoping.